Monday, 16 January 2012

Lazyness Is A State Of Being

Well, it's been a long time since I last entered anything in these blogs and I honestly actually feel a little bad about that...not too bad, let's not get carried away...just a little.  I do feel that its time for me to get back up on that wagon though...that's right, I'm going to start drinking in the afternoon again!  No wait, that's not it...right, I'll just write in my blog then I guess.

So where to start, I feel like I should be consistent with my mission statement..although I think that my mission statement is a bit of a sham when I average 1 story per 5 months...but let's not be picky.  Instead of just recapping what I have done over these past few months, I feel like I want to list some lessons I have learned.  So let's go...

1.  You can see the Eiffel Tower too many times:  Trust happens...

2.  When separated from North American TV for long enough you start to lose touch with current entertainment news.  You can detect this when you only know popular films by their French titles.  "You mean the Hangover isn't called Very Bad Trip?"

3.  Europeans are fitter than us because they walk everywhere!  Seriously, I have lost 15 pounds and I am not even trying.  North Americans really are just fat and lazy...sad but true.

4.  You can learn to speak a language pretty well after a year of trying to survive while immersed in also learn the language of blank, "I have no idea what to say" stares.

5.  You have to have balls the size of coconuts to want to drive in joke...coconuts.

6.  Scotch to a European is just called whiskey, why we feel the need to take it further than that I don't know.

7.  Apparently the only country that doesn't deep fry all their Chinese food is China.

8.  Go to England for fish and chips, meat pies and roast dinner.

9.  Go to France for duck, wine and cheese.

10.  Go to Belgium for waffles, beer and fries.

11.  Go to Amsterdam for weed.

12.  Do all of this in order for one Hell of a weekend.

13.  To any European who isn't aware of why your economy is in the crapper...I worked a total of 1 week before Christmas 2011 and was told by the employment office that I should apply for unemployment!  Seriously, I: 1. Am not French, 2. Had only worked 1 week in this country, and 3. didn't even ask about unemployment.  She practically begged me to

14.  The Dutch win the title of the nicest people on Earth...Canadians are up there still, but we have nothing on the Dutch...even the ones who don't smoke weed.

15.  The Germans do Christmas right, they really have their Christmas shit together.

16.  Speaking of the Germans...Beer halls!  End of story.

17.  France is a beautiful country from top to bottom and deserves to be seen and enjoyed.

18.  The Viking countries (Norway/Sweden/Finland) speak the best English of anyone I've heard over here, most of the time you can't even hear an accent.

19.  I have to award the hardest names to pronounce to the Russians...some of them have like 6 consonants and only 1 vowel!

And finally,

20.  No matter where you live, there really is no place like home...

Bonne Annee and I will write 5 months if my streak continues.